21 Laws of Computer Programming

As any experienced computer programmer knows, there are unwritten laws that govern software development. However there are no penalties for breaking these laws; rather, there is often a reward. Following are 21 Laws of Computer Programming:

1. Any given program, once deployed, is already obsolete.
2. It is easier to change the specification to fit the program than vice versa.
3. If a program is useful, it will have to be changed.
4. If a program is useless, it will have to be documented.
5. Only ten percent of the code in any given program will ever execute.
6. Software expands to consume all available resources.
7. Any non-trivial program contains at least one error.
8. The probability of a flawless demo is inversely proportional to the number of people watching, raised to the power of the amount of money involved.
9. Not until a program has been in production for at least six months will its most harmful error be discovered.
10. Undetectable errors are infinite in variety, in contrast to detectable errors, which by definition are limited.
11. The effort required to correct an error increases exponentially with time.
12. Program complexity grows until it exceeds the capabilities of the programmer who must maintain it.
13. Any code of your own that you haven't looked at in months might as well have been written by someone else.
14. Inside every small program is a large program struggling to get out.
15. The sooner you start coding a program, the longer it will take.
16. A carelessly planned project takes three times longer to complete than expected; a carefully planned project takes only twice as long.
17. Adding programmers to a late project makes it later.
18. A program is never less than 90% complete, and never more than 95% complete.
19. If you automate a mess, you get an automated mess.
20. Build a program that even a fool can use, and only a fool will want to use it.
21. Users truly don't know what they want in a program until they use it.

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25 things that are not what they seem

1. A firefly is not a fly - it is a beetle
2. A prairie dog is not a dog - it is a rodent
   
3. India ink is not from India - it is from China and Egypt
4. A horned toad is not a toad - it is a lizard
5. A lead pencil does not contain lead - it contains graphite
6. A douglas fir is not a fir - it is a pine
   
7. A silkworm is not a worm - it is a caterpillar
8. A peanut is not a nut - it is a legume
9. A panda bear is not a bear - it is a relative of the raccoon
10. An English horn is not English and it isn’t a horn - it is a French alto oboe
11. A guinea pig is not from guinea and it is not a pig - it is a rodent from South America
12. Shortbread is not a bread - it is a thick cookie
13. Dresden China is not from Dresden - it is from Meissen
14. A shooting star is not a star - it is a metorite
15. A funny bone is not a bone - it is the spot where the ulnar nerve touches the humerus
16. Chop suey is not a native Chinese dish - it was invented by Chinese immigrants in California
17. A bald eagle is not bald - it has flat white feathers on its head and neck when mature, and dark feathers when young
    
18. A banana tree is not a tree - it is a herb
19. A cucumber is not a vegetable - it is a fruit
20. A jackrabbit is not a rabbit - it is a hare
21. A piece of catgut is not from a cat - it is usually made from sheep intestines
22. A Mexican jumping bean is not a bean - it is a seed with a larva inside
23. A Turkish bath is not Turkish - it is Roman
24. A koala bear is not a bear - it is a marsupial
25. A sweetbread is not a bread - it is the pancreas or thymus gland from a calf or lamb

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[Humor] Evaluate Your Management Potential

Evaluate Your Management Potential
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